new year : new moon

new moon + year – song dot land

please enjoy tonight’s song dot land. a friend told me they listen to this podcast while they go to sleep. what a gift that was to my soul this week! this episode was recorded on 2022-01-02, the second day of the year. the day of the new moon.

this uncut episode has highs and lows as it explores the opportunity for change at the beginning of something new. i used a looping pedal in the middle that allowed for some fun playing around with self-accompaniment. enjoy!

moths fly at sunset by jesse

insp. polonaise no. 6 in a-flat, op. 53 (“heroic”)

this week’s scorched into existence after jesse listened to chopin. inspired by polonaise no. 6 in a-flat, op. 53 (“heroic”), jesse outputs music with the trouble and chaos inspired by chopin’s masterpiece.

listen to the song performed by van cliburn. it’s the first track from the my favourite chopin album.

artwork for insp polonaise no. 6 in a-flat, op. 53 (“heroic”)
artwork for episode. captured by jesse watkins in 2021

diamonds and sand

song dot land—diamonds and sand

in tonight’s beautiful song dot land, jesse takes you on a journey into diamonds and sand. who knows what that means. this one soars. the volume climbs and drops with rich reverb. 9:20 is beautiful. enjoy!

i mention my fear and concern for the globe. stop mowing your grass, life depends upon it!

diamonds and sand cover art
we identified this critter using the seek iOS app while enjoying a soccer game



i was diamonds and sand
i was perpetual
i split apart light
i split apart diamonds

look at a creek and look at the water
running on a day when the sun shines
all of the reflections
mirror our star

light bright
come to me
light bright
come to me
and take me, all of me for you

and define me in new positions
and realize transmission is all,
happens only when we talk


and with you
we soar
to the end
when fire
takes half the nation, the world

oh no!
we’re losing the simcity game of life on the world
stop mowing your grass
life depends upon it


oh (beautiful, soaring!)

(guitar atmosphere playing break)


without you i cannot stand
no no no
without you i cannot breathe
no no no

bring me the whole world
bring me to life
on the canyons and rivers
recycled through time


water drips down


congratulations to the stars
among us
taking their part

song dot land is a place where we can sing our songs
flips and flips and fix and and ride and have your “one is almost”

doubt i think it is real that this time i know your first name

i’m packed like an egg sandwich
protein for everyone

i’m packed like an egg sandwich

the rest remains untranscribed, a few more minutes

the mountains short

song dot land—the mountains short

i visited the smoky mountains for the first time in three years. i was moved. i was called again. ancient mountains. ancient wisdom.

scouting common pokeweed by jesse


stretch your legs
stretch your mind
what new ideas leave you unrefined?

all i am
where i knew that you’d leave me by the old side
i hold it
smoke rolls down from mountaintops

the mountains
rocks earth pushed high into skies
we climb

i swim in your rivers
i wash in your baths
your smoke rolls over me
your smoke rolls over me

i washed through you
i passed through cloud on earth

i’ve nothing left to want
i’ve nothing left to need
i have everything my fingers ever wanted
i can touch you
i can touch earth
i can touch heaven in my finger tips

there you are
there i wash
there i find
the song of the cove
stars burning down
bright in the middle of the night
look up and you’ll find all the deer are watching all of the heavens move
move with the night
time to move

the mystery of life
is that we come from earth
mixed with sky

heaven fly
heaven fly

2018 song dot land cover of the smoky mountains

giant boat/thousand

song dot land—giant boat/thousand

welcome to another episode of, a silly music podcast! i recorded 30 minutes of mind-numbing music, late at night and with a raspy voice. enjoy the journey that ends with a plea—please!—build a giant boat!

close up water drops on leaf
close up water drops on leaf, by jesse 2021



if i were yours i’d notice what it took
i would walk there from far away

you would be my only one
you would be my girl
i would carry you so far
you would see it all

into my arms
you find it in some new way

welcome to song dot land
sit and enjoy the journey
through song and sound
take a walk and look at the sun

what a beautiful night tonight will be
stars shining on you and me
the beauty resonates
the beauty resonates

and i was always given everything
and you were always with me

not alone, you are
not alone, you are
standing strong by your lonesome
you gave all
there you were holding hands
all your tries were in his plans

give it up
give it up
for good

give it up
give it up
for good
because fear has no place for you and me

you can be complete
on your own you will find
this could be a new beginning
this could be a new chance
maybe it’ll go right

oh, it did not go the way it seemed it would
oh, it did not resound across the fields
oh, I did not need anymore
you were mine and i alas! was yours

i pick at strings resounding love and unity
they drive each other insane
and all i have is together
in you i know everything

in you i know everything

i am a thousand miles
a thousand dreams
i lift it all to you

you could be a way for me to get back home!

limiting beliefs will drive you up a wall
you won’t have all you need
but look in the rearview mirror and see

a life moves better
hope rings new
we can be all you need

i would break ice and fish for you
i would explore the world with you

you could be all that you are
you could be all

i fly down a canyon without you
i give up my everything to be without you

the life begins again
every springtime
birds fly
no bounds

everytime you would love to see
you find something meaningful

i would be seventy-five percent the man you need
i would be all you need
i would be all of you
i would be all of you

i would be all of you

i could be all of you
all of you

i would run back from the dark into pools of joy
you would have it all
you would have it all
you would have it all
you would have it all


i play strings that resound the sweetest sounds
that, my friend—they comfort me in the dark

life is hard
and when you rest your head at night
you would have it all


i would step a million miles just to fly with you into something wild
you would have it all
you would have it all
you would have it all

we could be like this again
one from the other, you are
‘ere i am standing tall
but i know you are

you would have it all


if you could see
we would stand at shores and find a way to be
and find a way to be
and find a way to be
you would know all the things you want to know

love is strong
it’ll carry you and me along
there we’d walk
a thousand extraordinary miles
there you’d be
one with me

there you are
there you’d be
one with me

this is song dot land
this is song dot land
this is song dot land


little by little
you would become
all that you wanted
is finally done, finally gone

there you were
there you were
there you were a thousand miles


i’d give you mountains to walk on
you’d see it where you are
you’d be what you are to me
a piece of kindness wrapped in bacon

like an autoharp singing its final song
here’d you’d go
here’d you be

i could know you
you could know me too
there you’d stand
there you’ll arm me
like the noonday sun

you enchanted all we were
i would know if you were
you’d be captured by my trap
you’d be all aboard everythings like that

ooh, i love your coffee scent
ooh, it’s amazing what we can represent
piece by piece heart by heart
you can find a better to relate to those around you

and piece by piece, you can find it all when you look your way
when you look that way

cross the street with care
oh don’t walk when you’re about to get hit by a car
or worse, a subway train!
don’t be stupid
don’t be dull

you could know they had ten beehives at my sister’s house
and, oh, how pure and clean honey tastes!
i know it now better than ever
and, oh, it is my favorite
it is my favorite sweet sweet!


oh, the thing on water
white and red and otherwise
you could fall
you could fall

there you go
who you are and who you know
there you go
there you go

you would be it all on the house
you would wear it til it runs out
you could never know
i could walk and you would run
there is no substitute
to your kindness going on and on and on and on

cause we have eternal gifts
gifts that have been passed on to us
from the love and the hard work of those who came before

you carry it all through your veins ever day, every minute
we’re learning and growing
we’re learning and growing!


oh you know it if you saw it
you could love until the end of time
you would have everything in your heart and in your mind
you would have love
you would have food
you would have joy

i would know you in a lineup
i could tell it from the start
oh oh oh
oh oh oh
oh oh oh whoa
oh oh oh whoa

you’ve been listening to song dot land podcast
this weird longform song
oh, it’s guitar, but i hope you enjoyed it
thanks for listening

that short break in the middle was me drinking water
this is brought to you in one take
one take

and it’s ridiculous
but we sing and play and dance and sing and play for hours and hours
oh we can be finally who you need in us
and we could see you from the top to the start


build a giant boat
build a giant boat
build a giant boat
and float it out

build a giant boat
build a giant boat

this is song dot land
i’m jesse


song dot land vape

recorded in the middle of the night on august 4th, i sang wired with a guitar and a disposable vape in my hands.

nicotine isn’t a big deal in the grand perspective of life (aside from how it will, you know, kill us early and keep me dependent on an addictive chemical), but it’s a compromise of my commitments. i expect integrity in the small things and the big things, so buying another disposable shows my weakness and my need for self-compassion.

what’s one way you can have compassion on yourself?

spiders don’t vape – by jesse


in the late of night i come to you to sing
a story, how i finally found my wings
we could all find a way to finally find happiness
oh what a ruse
oh what a ruse

i could finally sense the end
where we laid our heads down
pillows beside each other
oh we’ll not have that again
oh we’ll not have that again

my mind lies
tells me i’m scared
my mind lies
tells me life’s not fair
my mind lies
in all i seek

[it’s] not in my grasp at last
it’s not mine to grasp at last

i could vape for an hour
just to try to find my way
through instability and chaos
i don’t want that for my life again

like when i was young
when my all fell apart
and my all fell apart
oh my loss was some gain perhaps
now that i sit here singing songs to you
now that i sit here singing songs


driving up in my camry
i thought what grandmas say
oh drive safe
oh drive pure

i could defend myself
or slam on the gas with my foot
i would push so far the oceans would rise up in protest
singing songs of how they had it all

and i’d finally find where my emptiness comes from
when i don’t know myself
when i don’t know myself

i would fly
i could swim
wherewithal carries all
and my voice could echo across the colorado mountains
and i’d find mountains wanting more than i can provide
and i would see you from the other side
we could finally meet again
we could finally meet again

where i know the buffalo once roamed
and all was water
and all was water

oh, i need you every moment i’m awake
i hate you too
i promised my kids vapes would end
and still i take another draw
and still i take another draw

and oh how do i live without you
and oh where can i run when i don’t have you
when i don’t have you
when i don’t have you?

so catch up with your friends
give them a call
don’t make them wait
we’ll be back together soon

i depend on molecules
to feed my molecules
trillions of us are right here to play

oh, i’m a bag of flesh and bones
cords connecting every part of me
trillions of us work
trillions of us work so i can waste a saturday playing
waste a saturday playing in hyrule field
i’ll dance and sing and whip my sword

and oh how i miss you


song dot land—paint

why do so many old people take up painting? paint explores the drive and motivation to create, to make, to push publish and share with others the fruit of our mind, bodies, souls.

“we make it by risking it all”

risk it all.

wildflower in the sunrise
wildflower in the sunrise, taken by jesse


look around you
what do you see?

a world full of squares afraid of who they are
who are you when you join me now?

you are all
you are all

i run so fast i do not see the way i went for long
i don’t look back ’cause sorrows come to find me

don’t look back and turn around as you run from hell
don’t look back as you run from hell

i could find you in a thousand faces
’cause you stand out so clear to me

oh i look and find you there
i looked for so long
for so long
where were you in my pain?
where were you in my pain?


hold on and run and don’t look back
we’re leaving hell at last
oh we are one and done
together we run fast

i would find you in the reflection of water
rain falls down and drops of sand on pavement
oh i need you, oh i need you

oh i need you
oh i need you
oh i need you
oh i need

all our days are numbered so let sorrows pass on by
my regrets melt like water
oh, wash down and float away
in the wind here at song dot land

all your days
all you try
all you have is left tonight

welcome to song dot land podcast
where we make up songs of life and pain and reality
when art is done right here
we craft like an improvisational plein air painting


i investigate in 6/8 time
all of things i did
and left behind

but the end of life
were where we left
why do so many old people start to paint?

it’s time to let it out
it’s time to let it out
all of these years i waited
it’s time to let it out

so scream with me
we’ll fly over oceans
let it be as you deny your emotions

one more day
’cause nothing matters in the grand scheme

i might be flying over pacific islands in my dreams
i may be lost at sea
i won’t find anything for me, for me, for me

you’ll still be there
i’ll still be there with you
in the moments when i can scream, when i can run

oh, a little bit further and you would be there too

when you’re old may you paint and recapture the truth you once had
before a job
before a grade
who were we when we were young?
before betrayal
before the tears
before my friends humiliated me at my party

who was i then
who was i then
i was the same person singing right now
thinking, oh if i could go back

oh there’s no way back
the sun rises and sets
express yourself
you’re beautiful

paint the dreams you left behind
in your osteoporosis
you can never visit again
a man without regrets is not a man

song dot land guides me to areas where my heart could bleed
truth and life is so scary for me to find
and i look on back on what a good day i had
in the present moment

oh my mind
be generous to me
i’ll give and take
i’ll dream
i’ll wake
i’ll still put my hand to the plow and get it done somehow

but love comes through risk and vulnerability
so push publish
share it
share it


when nothing is one
we’re all when we’re one
so push publish and take your seat in the chorus of culture

for all of our ideas evolve little chances to thrive and grow and glow and know
that we all as one might see the sun rise on a new day that’s better for our kids
how could Picasso know that we would be conversing about him in dormitories two hundred years later? no one can know, so just push publish

you don’t know
i don’t know
we don’t know
we can’t see the future
so don’t have shame for all the fucked up things in this stupid world
won’t even matter when we’re dead
and your post still lives on
when we’re dead

[instrumental until 13:30]

don’t tell other people how to live
’cause everything evolves
you need only worry for yourself

so push publish

or at least wait until you’re old
and pick up the paintbrush and tell the world at last
oh, i made it
every crazy day and storm
oh, made it
the ball keeps spinning more and more
but, oh, i made it
i know i’m tired
but oh how i made it

keep on
keep on
keep on
keep on


here at song dot land i run to
look at all the possibilities of life living with you
oh we share the best we share the worst
will you accept me as i am?

oh, fear and longing for acceptance

thank you for another sweet saturday night with me
take me and find me where everyone else is free
i could look for you a thousand hours and still come up short
oh, search and not give up
i will search and not give up
make and create and do not stop or fear

song dot land is brought to you by jesse
for years i’ve called this thing so weird, i’ve been searching
i realize i create for my own soul
and i push publish so i know
i do all i can in every day to be a maker
may you do the same in all your ways
don’t pretend that life is simple and you got it figured out
it’s challenging every day
if you don’t express yourself, you won’t know how to take the next step

’cause love, love will guide you
and love is the same as making

take risks and find that vulnerable spot that still bleeds
that weak, sad spot that still bleeds

goodbye for now
until we meet again
don’t fear what your heart guides you to
just paint
just paint
with the movement of your arms and the flashing of your eyes
just paint
just paint
tell the world your story
just paint
just paint
let the fake blood run down your cheek
and shoot, and find, you don’t have anything to prove
you’ll find:
we make it by risking it all

pieces ashes kroger

pieces ashes kroger—song dot land

welcome to song dot land, a soundscape of improvised song
it’s longform improve for acoustic guitar music and singing
you may hate it
you may love it
thanks for listening!

sunset spider image
sunset spider


i would never let you know
that you had to run
just to find your way home

it would be a cold, cold day
in hell
when i let my heart be taken again
i would run and hide and deny myself
if only i could save it from the pain

the way i grow
the way you know
is what we hold so dear
the way i know
the one we’ll show
is our future self

i held you close
for so long the morning sun
shined and let me say good morning
breakfast photosynthesis

the way i grow
the way you know
is what we hold so dear
the way i know
the one we’ll show
is our future self

there’s no place warmer than your arms

i hold you piece by piece
we go there little by little
giving kindness and care
a way play fair

would you be the only one if you were left
on the face of the earth
would you still run toward your own friends
let ’em know who you are

’cause it’s in knowing who you are
that we grow over
the divisions in our lives
my lack of trust and love
it’s all just a little bit piece by piece

you and i could know
what role we had to show and go
little by little, piece by piece
i’m yours, i’m yours tonight

The present moment is all we got
that’s just right here
right now
what’s up

this is all we got
i got nothing left

the world is fire
the world is fire

burn burn burn burn
log by log
wash all i do in this
and little by little you give your whole self

i turn it upside down
in your hand is war
i turn it upside down and it’s all a story

where you came from far away
where you came from far away we sing still

overall you give your all
everything you can
you could give your best friends
just a little bit more attention, gratitude

it all washes down
all washes down
all washes down for me

i would be there miles and miles with you
but somewhere out there would be true
you’d give more than i understand
you’d offer your whole self to the land

and oh you’d be
so much more so much sweeter so much kinder overall

oh you’d have it piece by piece
oh you’d have it piece by piece
i met a superhuman walking in the woods
they smelled every flower
who was i to ever ask them why?

but with that little question the world opened up
to new ideas
like every blade is life
every grate is life

control chaos all around
let the blade of grass cut your skin
a thing in a OH town

and there, there
you’ll have life

every little cut
every little scratch
every little moment that you’d thought you’d be back

you would have it all in pieces
over mountains i will crawl
just to have
just to have
just to have
just to have

i would give my everything
i would give it all
i would give my everything
if you could stall

welcome to song dot land


oh it’s been the time

song dot land
is a song where we glore together
on the spot
listen to me while i shout

’cause all my days
i’ve wanted to entertain
give my all
to you forever

i’d have it all
i’d wash you over
i’d take you down to the kingdoms
below the ground
back down where you’re from

oh, in golden fields
medallions, they wash sunflowers
and i drink my milk

i could be a billion dollars
raining from the sky
if i could
oh we’d fly and fly and fly

if i could only be a dinosaur
fly above so high above all that’s below

imagine how long an eagle got to live at the top of it’s food chain
soaring through the sky
raising families

oh how beautiful
and oh how wonderful
is all we have, is all we have

oh how wonderful and oh how beautiful
is every step you have

la da da da da da

if i were a puzzle i’d be pieces under your floor

falling into ways i didn’t expect
opportunities that throw us off our game

we would be alive
we would be alive
we would be alive
we would be alive

i was strings of spaghetti
i was strings of spaghetti on your blouse

i could look from here to there
it’d all be here to there
it’d all be me

i’d still be there
you’d still be with me

La da da da
La da da da

i was a little clover on the hillside where cows grazed
my root bulb is strong
i have thousands of kids
oh it’s wonderful

we grow and drink the sun and take our names
we give every piece of the heart until it rains
i am lovin’ you
i am lovin’ you

i am lovin’ you
when life falls down
i see the stars

wash me in your wind and in your glow
let your smell go over, flow
i will still be strong through all the storms
sure my life will come back when the sun shines again

i could a thousand miles
floating down the river Snake
and never see your eyes get
and it would come and congratulate every little thing i ever

we would have eternity
we would dance around in circles
and in ashes, ashes we all fall down
as inevitable
and we all know

death is inevitable
so we have to enjoy today
death is inevitable
it comes for all it comes for all it comes for all



i knew you long ago
where you were my best friend
lone there was some magic way
where you were my best friend
and in you went to know
then you have to go
then you have to go

here at song dot land
we sing off the blood of the land
oh it’s such sweet meat
eat your peas
carrots too
oh they taste like a shrew could live so well

and we know
we all know that we would all be taken care of
and we all would know
i was with you
oh my hurt
my fungus toe
it always tasted super gross

i had new in a million places
oh your faces
came back where we always were
i loved you so much
loved you so much

you were thus

this has been the song dot land podcast
song dot land is a url
oh it is, it is
does this make any sense? no it doesn’t

music flies on the wings of a bird
it’s like wind filling space
oh, get in it raw
open up to who you could be

i was—little by little—growing
somewhere there i saw
there you and i
there we were
there we were
there we were
there we were just you and i

i have little pieces of my heart
scattered about where life could start
letting my friends know where i am
my horecrux is falling apart again

and i’m left pieces
and i’m left pieces


goodnight my friends
we’re trying again
in the church above
the body and blood

for in cells a city thrives
in my cells my thrives
it’s time to go to work
it’s time to give it all
it’s time to let the people in your life know how much you care

i have pieces of your heart
you are pieces of my puples
i had it figured out and then i lost the plot

i was oh so close
i was almost there
i was oh so close to you
i was almost there

[whistles @33]

and i was there
in step with you
and i was there
and you true

song dot land
how do you feel today?
look up and smile and say
how amazing is it that i’m alive

how amazing is it that i’m alive
how amazing is it that i am
amazing is it that i am
amazing is it that i am
how amazing is life!

how ridiculous i’m even alive

this has been song dot land
i give you my whole heart in thanks
to my friends
to you
to all we are

i say
thank you for joining me in the weirdest thing
it’s something new
i’m trying to give it a chance

enjoy kroger